cuti aku cuti kamu

Banyak benda nak cerita tp tk tau nak mula dekat mana..cuti semester 2 dah mula..so maknanya tngah cuti sekarang..bila cuti semua orang suka..dah la dapat cuti lama kalini..2 months baby..lama tu..sebulan sebelum cuti pon orang dah sibuk bising pasal cuti..seminggu sebelum cuti, orang dah sibuk pasal nak kemas barang..semua buat muka happy nak balik rumah..yala..dah lama tak balik..terutamanya yg duduk sabah sarawak..lagi menebal rindunya...bila nak balik..terbayang perkara2 gembira..nak makan masakan mak yang dah lama tak rasa..bestnya...dah lama teringin nak makan..spend time sama2..boleh pergi jalan2..sumpah bahagia..even dengar mak ayah membebel pon tak apa..lepas rindu katanya..hahha..

Itu situasi majority pelajar2..tp bukan aku..aku lagi lambat cuti lagi bagus..lagi sekejap cuti lagi bagus..tak suka balik rumah..balik rumah bukan ada apa..stress lagi ada..rumah bersepah..nak duduk pon tak selesa..kalau tk balik rumah tk boleh..nak duduk mana..adik yang aku rindu pon tkd dekat rumah..tak teringin makan masakan mak yang dah lama tak makan?tipu la tak teringin..dah lama tak rasa..Ya Allah..rindunya...tp nak buat macam mana..balik rumah pon bukan boleh rasa..

Mesti tak faham dan pelik kan, kenpa aku rasa macam ni..entahlaa..balik rumah pon bukan sbb nak balik..balik sebab tngah tkd duit and tkd tempat lain nak stay..

Sebenarnya balik tak balik sama saja..aku balik sbb ni ja tempat berteduh yang tk guna duit..rumah ni kosong kot..mana ada orang..tk macam dulu..dulu lain..terasa tenang rumah tu..situasi yang selesa untuk tinggal..even kene pekakkan telinga dengar mak membebel..haha..sekarang rumah senyap kot..tkd dengar gelak tawa..sedih gila hidup macam ni..

Bertahan la hidup macam ni dua bulan..rumah tkd apa..nak beli barang dapur nak masak pon tk bole..tkd duit..nampak tk?sama ja kan balik tk balik..still kene berlapar..jngan salah faham..aku ada makan dkt rumah ni..abang aku ada beli makan..tp sama jalah kan?makan bungkus..tkd beza duduk universiti..

Aku tk salahkan sapa2 hidup jadi tunggang langgang macam ni..aku tau semua orang dalam family aku rasa apa yang aku rasa..mungkin lagi teruk, aku tak tau..tp aku tak tau nak share dekat sapa apa yg aku rasa..so aku share dekat sini..sbb aku tau dkt sini tkd orang nk judge aku..follower pon tk ramai kan...tp kalau anda yang tengah baca ni rasa kesian dkt aku..please..saya tak mintak simpati anda..saya bukan nak perhatian..ini hanya luahan perasaan..kalau anda rasa saya tk patot luahkan dkt sini..ya, mungkin anda benar..saya tk patot buat macam ni..tp, saya bukan manusia yg kuat nk tanggung sorang2..nak judge ikot suka nak fikir macam mana..sbb apa yg saya tahu..selagi anda tidak di tempat saya..anda tk tahu apa yg saya rasa..my life is mess..and i hate it..i will make a change to it...to make it better..but no step have been taken yet..huhhhhh..that make me feel worst..this is sucks..

awesome buddyz

with full of brag i tell you people that i love my classmate ! they are like super cool super sweet.. our class leader is the coolest president that i ever meet (she hate when people praise her so i praise her more, haha)..but seriously..she is so caring and yet responsibility..look simple but pretty awesome..she is one of the kind..i tell you baby..one of the kind..
we are the only culinary art class at UITMPP that only have girls members and no boys at all..so we will be a legend!cool is it? well of course, there are some people who hate us..they say we are spoil brat and many more..well i can understand how jealous they are to us..haha...but we don't care..we support each other..ohhh..this is our picture :)..there a lot that look more pretty than this..just that i don't have it..i will post it next time..or a video instead?haha..just wait..our story of HM1152C just begin..

oh crush

okay,its been so long from my last post,well i'm being busy lately..i just come back from a cool camping trip at sungai sedim, kedah. and me as AJK activity for running chef now busy handling the activity..so busy.. even i'm busy with my stuff but i do have time to have a good time with my friend..well,i do have fun at the camp..and my AJK team was super cool too..so much fun when hang out with them..even in the meeting we have fun making joke and laughing together.. back to the topic which is crush.. okay,since my last impossible crush that so long ago been forgotten..i never fall for another crush..its been a year that my heart empty..and my mom left make my heart more empty.. so,when suddenly this ordinary guy that i met at the pulau(went to pulau last two weeks because of the AJK team work)really catch my heart.. actually..its not that serious at first..my friend aka AJK team just playing with she admire him..and he admire her..its normal..me too just playing with it for fun..they say i admire that ordinary guy..so i just admit it and play the game.. the admire game become more interesting when that ordinary guy also went to the camp at sungai sedim..well,i'm cool at first..but the moment when you know him..you will melt,i tell you..you will melt..he is so totally not handsome at all,a little bit chubby..i don't know how my heart melt so easily with him.. but that's not the point.. the point is,whenever or whatever crush i have..i usually end up feeling stress out and down..its complicated to write but i always feel this way.. he treat me nicely at first but when my heart and mind totally into him,he suddenly left me out..what the hell? see?i guess i never have a boyfriend like ever...no boyfriend no husband..seriously? and it will hard for me to fall in love again next time..its hurt you know..so hurt... fall in love taste like coffee,sweet and bitter at the same time.. #no picture guys..put picture of my crush here will make it less fun..hehe

the come back

It's been so long since the last time i updating my blog..and i should let people now about my sick mother..my mother already with our beloved God, Allah.. 14 July 2012 was the date when my mother passed away..since that,i have being so busy with my life..well,it's not easy for me to keep on my life without her..so hard.. people might think that i'm tough.. because of the smile on my face and the tears that they never seen..but,no worry..right now, i already improve my life..i really think that i need to do that, for my self and my family..for those who knows me and my mom..pray for my mom and me..pray for my mother happiness at there..and pray for me to be strong for my future.. now..she is gone..left us and let us learn to be more strong..